What Do You Do When Every Thought and Feeling You Have Has Been Thrown Up in The Air and You Can’t Catch Any of Them?

You literally watch your father take his last breath in a hospital bed, just days after a medical incident that isn’t totally clear.

You just be.

Your father dies and your thoughts and feelings are thrown up in the air.

You just be.

You go to your father’s funeral and as you speak, you feel as if none of it is real.

You just be.

You bury your father and you see your best friend and literally run and jump into her arms and cry together.

You just be.

You sit shiva with your family and it is helpful and it fucking sucks at the same time.

You just be.

You live in a bubble in your head and feel such sadness and pain.

You just be.

Two weeks to the day of his death, you’re in a bad car accident and while you are fine, you don’t understand its meaning, as there must be one.

You just be.

The real dilemma is: How do you just be?